My Name Was Baby

From a rising intersex activist in the Midwest, a candid memoir about growing up different and an inspiring story of self-discovery and self-acceptance.

When Chris Arnone was born in Independence, Missouri, nobody could tell what sex he was. For the first few days of his life, until a chromosome test confirmed he was a boy, his parents called him Baby. From this first, literal “coming out,” it was clear he was different. His life was punctuated by a string of surgeries and trips to the ER, unrecognizable and confusing diagrams in sex ed class, and the need to preface every intimate encounter by explaining his medical history. But it wasn’t until he was thirty-seven that he discovered he didn't have “birth defects”—he was intersex.

In this fresh and affirming memoir, Chris’s struggles with anxiety, confusion, and a painful journey toward self-acceptance will be familiar to LGBTQIA people everywhere. But he also offers a perspective that is largely untold: that of an intersex man, existing in the toxic masculine culture of the heartland; parents who were open and accepting of his differences; and doctors who (mostly) did no harm.

It is a deep and wide exploration of religion and politics, gender and sexuality, frat parties, burlesque shows, and Magic: The Gathering. Arnone boldly shows how the lives of intersex folks can be so different and yet so familiar to everyone, helping us all take one step closer to understanding and acceptance.

With raw vulnerability, emotional range, and a quick wit, My Name Was Baby offers something inspiring for everyone, from self-assured manly men to confused genderqueer kids. It is the story of someone who came to love who he is and hopes everyone else can love themselves, too.

Chris M. Arnone (he/him) was weaned on comic books and Hardy Boys novels, finding his first literary love in the X-Men, though his longest lasting is a love for Ray Bradbury. He mostly writes science fiction and fantasy, though he’s known to dabble in poetry, playwriting, and literary fiction. As an intersex man, he is particularly interested in gender and sexuality in his writing.

Arnone is author of the cyberpunk heist series, The Jayu City Chronicles. He is a senior contributor for Book Riot and a board member of Whispering Prairie Press. He has an MFA in Creative Writing from the University of Missouri–Kansas City. He also performs on many stages in Kansas City, where he lives with his wife Christy and their cats.