CAN YOU MAKE THIS THING GO FASTER?

Pre-order the hilarious new collection of stories and observations from Jeremy Clarkson - setting our off-kilter world to rights with thigh-slapping wit once again

These days, you might know him better as a tractor-driving Gentleman Farmer, but Jeremy Clarkson wasn''t always a horny-handed son of the soil.

Not at all . . .

Back in the day Jeremy was far more likely to be found gunning around the world in a haze of burnt rubber and petrol fumes. But life as a globe-trotting petrol-head also meant he was forced endure more than his fair share of foolishness, frustration and downright bafflement. And, while Jeremy may not a patient man, you have to ask why anyone should have to consider issues as diverse and perplexing as:

*The downsides of relaxing in a bath of crude oil
*Why fishing is for people who hate their kids
*Whether there are noise-cancelling headphones with the power to silence James May
*Why saving the planet means soggy paper straws and no more children
*What to do about the rambler who stole his marrow

But as puzzling and exasperating as life on the road often seemed to be, you could always count on Jeremy to set the world to rights with a rare wit and unique understanding. And at full throttle. Just don''t expect it to all go smoothly . . .

Praise for Clarkson:

''Brilliant . . . laugh-out-loud'' Daily Telegraph

''Outrageously funny . . . will have you in stitches'' Time Out

''Very funny . . . I cracked up laughing on the tube'' Evening Standard